Thursday, February 09, 2006

From one of my all time favorite blogs.If you follow every social trend that is going on you're bound to find yourself in a rut...............

Friends with Benefits

Two years ago, the New York Times ran an article on "Friends with Benefits" which seems to be the preferred form of relationship with young singles. Key points:
Myth: Women felt empowered by this casual non-committal sex relationship. Fact: In these relationships, the women were only performing sex acts for the men and getting nothing in return. Instead of meeting as equals, the women were completely capitulating to the man's terms.
Myth: It is a real relationship. Fact: The women consider the "friends with benefits" situation to be a pseudo-relationship if not a real one. The men consider the woman to be a stupid whore. Getting free sex with no commitment to a man is like getting away with stealing. It's a thrill as long as it goes on, but they never care anything for the woman beyond the fun she offers. The trick is to always pretend to be the woman's friend. A woman stupid enough to go along with this type of set-up will believe anything.
Myth: When the woman realizes she has been used - often for many years - she accepts this and tries to maintain the "friendship". Fact: Women are always hurt when love is not returned for sex. When the pseudo-relationship ends, the women react with tears and intense emotional pain or develop a false bravado around having sex detached from emotion.
I've met several women who were in "friends with benefits" relationships for a year or more. Usually, they stay "best friends" with the men who used them and moved on - laughing at the used-up and stupid victim they left behind.Obviously, these relationships are better for men. The women are used and treated like free hookers, but they seem to want this kind of relationship much more than a traditional, loving and respectful marriage. In reality, only the worst kind of man becomes involved with a woman in this way. Sadly, it's really what women want. Even worse, the women who are used in this way become incapable of loving men who are good for them. Instead, they fixate on the players and the users - forever wondering why they cannot be happy, always stuck on a jerk while good men are turned away.Still, it is a good situation for men. Bravo feminism!


At 2/10/2006 02:44:00 AM, Blogger Kenyangal said...

I feel that such relationships are not what women want! They just think that that is the best they can get that is closest to a commited relationship. Times are changing though as the younger generation learns from the mistakes made by women in previous generations.

At 2/10/2006 06:12:00 AM, Blogger Instigator said...

@ Kenyangal
Thank you for passing by.It seems that these women need to know that those relationships at the end of the day benefit men more then they have no-one to blame but themselves for the results.I think you have high hopes for human beings coz we all repeat the same mistakes year in year out!

At 3/02/2006 03:06:00 AM, Blogger KenyanMusings said...

it is strange the things a lot of women are willing to settle for. me, I am a sucker for a good old fashioned romance, where I am a his woman and he is my man. Anything short of that sucks. I am possesive, and I make no apologies for wanting my man to myself and myself alone. the sex, the emotions, the times, the whole shiding(sp).
anyway, I came to remember that post you left on Kritik's ati how to shut a woman up ...''This can be anything like you banging the table when she is mid-sentence,bursting in laughter, staring at a distinct feature on her face etc'...LOOOOLLL mara 1 million. That killed me like I could not stop laughing last night.
And I am yet to find out why you take such a hard stance against feminism. I am in many ways one, and you seem to be against feminism in most forms.......even when it makes perfect sense


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